# 33

I'm a slacker. I have nothing seriously funny to show you today. Why must you always take, take, TAKE! When is it my turn to TAKE?! Huh?! When will you step up to the plate and show me some fucking funny shit?



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I can wait.

#19

It's that time again! Fuckin Funny Shit Friday.
I haven't been nearly offensive or inappropriate enough this week. So Enjoy.


Hey the cute little stick girl with a lop-sided rack read my mind... Fuck Yea!











... Wait those IS Goats?!










This is why I stopped selling Mary Kay...


Not only are the matching outfits over the top, wait wait, do their earrings match too? For the love of Allah... I mean isn't enough that they all have the same hairdresser. Miss "T" looks like she might have shit herself; she's worried because now their getup's don't match. Miss "G" is gonna get it when Miss OCD "I" sees that her G is not straight and her right arm is in the shot. COME ON Miss G, get it together! Oh right, she's a G, she can do that. I'm not even gonna touch the 50 year old Brittney Spears. Not. Gonna. Do. It.



Well kiddos, I figured I'd spare us all another holiday post (don't hold your breathe, I feel a # 19.5 comin on) Enjoy your day, do what want, wear what you want and act like no one's looking.
That is how we become famous on the Internet...

# 9

You know what is more amazing than Fridays? Thursdays that are actually Fridays. Yep. Today is my Friday. I'm going for a little weekend trip with the ladies. I am so damned excited and this day is dragging along... Why is it when there's fun plans ahead the mandatory stuff, like work, feels like it takes twice as long.

Ya know I've had a pretty crazy week... Last weekend's Halloween party went over lovely; I went as a pirate wench. I had lots of help with the decorations and they turned out great.

I've been gathering boxes cause I'm moving in less than a month... eek. And I'm out of town for half this month. I hate packing, but I have sworn up and down that I will not just throw everything into boxes and go. I want to sift through it all and only take what I need. I went through my clothes last night because we're doing a clothes swap this weekend. Why do I still find it difficult to get rid of those too small jeans... I guess we'll call it hope. I'm gonna hope my fatass into those jeans.

Also, my boyfriend was in a wreck. He actually hit a drunk driver... well the drunk ran the red light, so it's not my honey's fault. He is perfectly fine too, which is just nuts if you look at his car. He does have a small scratch on his arm but that's it. So lucky.

Well, this killed 5 minutes...

# 8

Oops. I forget I have a blog sometimes. I know all my devoted followers check obsessively for new posts each day, sorry to disappoint.

The day after hump day always leaves me feeling a little worn out, relieved and excited.

I'm worn out from the lack of sleep I've gotten this week. I've laid awake almost night while my mind whores around. From this weekend until the end of the year my calendar is completely full. I don't think I could cram one more thing in if I had too... that sounds dirty, I like it.

I'm relieved that it's almost the weekend. I've been helping plan this Halloween party and I can't wait for it to be over with. Just a few more days. I have in fact changed costume ideas, for the 3rd time, and as of this moment it's up in the air.

I'm mostly excited today; payday is tomorrow and I need groceries. It's sad how excited I get to grocery shop, but when you're fucking Kroger on the regular how could you not be excited.

So there you go, another meaningless post about random shit that doesn't make a difference and only serves to help me pass time.

# 7

Fuckin Funny Shit Friday:

Talk to God

I realize this may offend some people, but then again I don't really care. My sense of humor really knows no bounds. I am in no shape or form religious. I do believe in something higher, just not any God that this world deems acceptable. I guess I should take my own advice when it comes to appropriate work conversation (no politics, religion, etc) and apply that to my blog... but where's the fun in that.

So my conversation with iGod went a little something like...

Me: for real
God:Existing in reality, eh?
Me: fo sho
God:That
remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about Gay sex with Jesus.

That God-guy is a funny mother fucker...